The River

I have a tattoo of a dragonfly above my ankle.  I was always terrified of getting a tattoo, but one day mom and I decided to go get one together.  Looking around trying to figure out what I would be able to look at every day for the rest of my life and smile – I saw the dragonfly.  The dragonfly gives me a very specific image in my mind, more like a movie running, actually.  I see myself floating down the river when I was a kid and it was the absolute most wonderful place in the world.  My parents used to take me floating on air mattresses (of course, when I was little – I was in a floatie that looked like a turtle).  Those were my happiest memories, always laughing, out away from the rest of the world.  To me, it looked like a jungle we were floating through.  I like remembering how the world looked when I was small and it seemed SO big.  As an adult, I’ve wondered if I would ever make it back there with my parents on a bunch of air mattresses just having fun.  After going through major surgery and then chemotherapy, I wasn’t sure if my Mom would ever make it back down to the river with me.  I knew she was going to live a long happy life, but I just didn’t know if she would get back to the river.  Yesterday, she did.  And I think I was twice as happy this time as I was when I was a kid.  My family is SO valuable to me.  The memories I have of growing up in the coolest, quirkiest, most fun family in the world – are priceless.  Reliving those memories with my husband and kids makes me think that life is this amazing regenerating thing that demands that I open my eyes each morning with an exceptional unwavering hope.  So…that is what I do. 🙂

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Posted on June 2, 2010, in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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